Stumble In

There is a bar nearby called the Stumble In. I've often mused at how appropriate that name could be for some of its regular patrons. Think about it. The name is Stumble In, not Stumble Out. Picture a down-on-his-luck salesman who should be heading home to his family instead stumbling in to yield to his drinking problem and handing over his money for a 100 proof dose of the very juice that may have contributed to his sad estate in the first place. Ironic.


This week I was off work and tying up loose ends made up the daily agenda. One loose end was the loose rear shifter pawl on my Ultra. This part has been quick-fixed by the service departments at Harley stealerships in Fort Collins, Colorado, Statesville, North Carolina, and this past March, right here in Riverside, California. I've had the work covered by the extended warranty in the last two instances. Anyway it's loose again and so Thursday down to the stealership I went. I dropped off the bike and rode home on another one of their rentals. This one was an Ultra Limited.


Not sure what makes it "limited", but is was a nice scoot with a 103 inch motor. It had only 4500 miles on it and so represents what my bike would be like brand new. I usually would take this opportunity to ride the dickens out of someone else's bike for a few days. This time, however, I was feeling a little vulnerable. Each time after putting a newer bike through the paces, it has taken me upwards of a week to regain an appropriate sense of contentment with my own bike. So this time I decided to spare myself the discomfort and just ride straight home, park it and not touch it until I rode it directly back to its rightful place.


Today I did just that. The service tech called to let me know I could pick up my bike and I rode the new one straight there. When I turned it in the rental agent noted that I'd only ridden the bike 11 miles! "Yup." I replied. The trouble is that's all it took to give me a whiff of the greater horse power, smoother suspension and six speed transmission this new model had to offer.


Further, I had to wait another hour to get my own bike. In that time I saw over fifty other bikes roll in and out, none (that I could detect, anyway) approaching the vintage and mileage of my own. The place was really hopping. People were walking past me in new biker garb and carrying huge bags of MoCo merchandise. To make things worse, I witnessed a gent discussing a trade-in deal with a salesman. "We'll give you fifty-three hundred for this one so the payments should be pretty manageable for you then."


Man, I'm glad that guy didn't sic one of his sale-mates on me right then. With my shades on and sitting there in my work clothes I must have masked my vulnerability pretty well. I'm really feeling the holiday financial pinch, and this before I've even paid all the related bills. Feeling spent always makes me hungry to spend. Ironic.


"Face it, Brian," I leveled with myself when those two had passed on, "you want a newer bike."


"True," I admitted. "It would be cool to have better performance and less maintenance,"


Providentially my musing was interrupted just then by the tech walking up my Ultra. "Just leave it right here." I said impatiently as I grabbed my helmet and fairly leapt into the saddle.


"Hey, Bro, sorry it took so long. We topped off the gas for you to make up for it."


"Thanks a bunch," I replied. "It's all good. I've just gotta git."


I felt like an alcoholic who'd had to meet someone in the parking lot of the Stumble In. All this "newness" was intoxicating. With one last glance at the big glass doors of the showroom I cinched up my helmet and headed off.


I ran an errand on my way home and there was just enough fresh air along the way to clear my head. I've got three years left on my warranty and just paid a mere fifty bucks on a $645 job while not missing a day of riding. My bike meets all my needs more than adequately. "Look what I'm doing right now," I reminded myself as I blasted through town in the cool evening light. And every month I make absolutely no payments on any vehicle. Even if I started with a brand new "Limited" I'd have to spent a pile of money for pipes and amenities I already have on this bike. There is no way I'd be as happy juiced up on that 103 proof new bike as I am not having to pay for one.


"Yup, I'm good." I smiled. "Maybe I'll stop and get some ice-cream for the family. I can afford it."